It’s detrimental and ultimately destructive to so many of the foundations of civilization.
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Kirk Cameron, on homosexuality. Yes, surely it’s homosexuality that will destroy us all, seeing as how it’s responsible for so many wars, hate groups, and ignorant-ass legislation. Oh, wait. That’s organized religion I’m thinking of. Never mind.
Can people stop inviting this dude on talk shows? Didn’t he stop being relevant in like 1993? I don’t think anyone is sitting at home going, “I wish Piers Morgan would invite that Kirk Cameron on his show. I’d like to hear his thoughts on things.”
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If I was on that plane with my kids, it wouldn’t have went down like it did.
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Mark Wahlberg, on the events of 9/11
He’s since apologized, but how smug and oblivious do you have to be to say something like that in the first place? Out loud. In public. To a reporter! Oh, Marky Mark.
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STFU and put your goddamned phone away. Yes, you too.
STFU, Former Child Stars
So Shia LaBeouf was all, “You could have put Frankie Muniz into any of the movies I’ve been in and those movies still would’ve still been No. 1.”
And then Frankie Muniz was all, “Dear Shia Labeouf. It’s getting creepy the fact that you can’t stop talking about me. It’s been 12 years now. I don’t know you. Thanks.”
And then I was all, bwahahaha what? Shia LaBeouf didn’t even need to bring this guy up, but he wasn’t exactly nasty. I don’t know if Frankie Muniz’s level of hostility is really warranted here. Apparently he also likes to respond to critiques of his acting on Twitter thusly: “Yeah, but being retired with $40,000,000.00 at 19 has not been awful. Good luck moving out of your moms house before you’re 35.” Dude. Bitter much?
I don’t know, I just think it’s hilarious that apparently there’s a long-standing “feud” between these two, and that it’s “heating up.” HILARIOUS. Both of y’all shut up and go to your rooms.
STFU, Mel Gibson
Seriously, just … stop talking. Stop talking altogether. Every time this dude opens his mouth now, something immensely fucked up comes tumbling out.
I’d play the Riddler in the next Batman, although it would be hard to top Heath as the villain, and I’m a little hairy for tights. I’m using this article as an ad. Chris, call me, I’ll do anything. I could be a great character — or some weird little man in the background in Arkham Asylum.
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Robin Williams
NO. From your mouth to Satan’s ears, Robin Williams. No. Just … no. Not that Robin Williams can’t actually act when he wants to, but so can Jim Carrey and OMG DO YOU REMEMBER BATMAN FOREVER? Yes? That way lies madness. I know Christopher Nolan is far too brilliant to go for this (even a cameo would be too cheesy), so now let’s just pretend this never happened. Okay? Okay.
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